


Of Sad Days and Forgotten Smiles

by Ralemalt



Series: A Patchwork Family [4]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Family Feels, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt Fíli, Hurt Kíli, Injury, Kid Fíli and Kíli, M/M, Minor Character Death, There are injured children and hospitals mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 18:01:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7902358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ralemalt/pseuds/Ralemalt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin needs to take a break, and he spends it the best way he knows how. With his boys. Especially when the trauma of the past rears its ugly head.</p>
<p>(The Minor Character Death warning is for the explanation of Fili and Kili's parents.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Sad Days and Forgotten Smiles

**Author's Note:**

> I've been really nervous about posting this one, and I've rewritten it a couple of times but it never seemed to work the way I wanted it to. So I decided to just go with it :) Hope you enjoy!
> 
> [I did research child trauma](http://cancer.dartmouth.edu/patients/health_encyclopedia/ncicdr0000062828), but it seems that a lot of children respond differently so I couldn't get specifics.
> 
> For S.

Thorin Oakenshield was exhausted.

It was a bone deep kind of exhaustion that had built over months and months of constant over thinking and over worrying, of fearing what small disaster was going to happen next, of wondering if he was screwing everything up because it wasn't just himself he had to think about anymore, and most importantly because of the heavy grief that weighed on all of them.

A tired sigh passed between dry lips as he glanced away from the darkened ceiling and toward the glowing green numbers of his alarm clock.

3:47 stared at him and as he watched the seven flicked into an eight.

Dwalin had forced him to take a day off and he still couldn’t find rest even though both his mind and body badly needed it. When the clock finally read 4:58, he forced himself up and out of bed with another sigh. There was no use lying there if he knew sleep was going to continue evading him.

The house was dark and quiet as he puttered quietly around the kitchen, going through the mindless motions of making a pot of coffee and pouring a cup when it was done perking. The room was a little cool, but the rumpled sweats and t-shirt he had on would be enough until the day grew a little warmer.

As he leaned against the kitchen counter and savored the warmth of the mug and the bitter taste almost burning his tongue, he peered into the dining area. The table was free of all the papers that had been scattered over it before he’d retired for the night so he couldn’t even look over them again. That had probably been Dwalin’s plan.

It was too early for the daily paper to have been delivered, and while Dwalin had bookshelves lined with books, Thorin wasn’t really in the mood for reading. He was used to doing things with his hands, building, creating, or tearing apart, so sitting and doing nothing was rather difficult for him. He allowed his body to sink down into the plush chair with a soft groan.

The moment they’d arrived in town he’d practically thrown himself into restoring the old building he’d somewhat foolishly bought. It was a mess, and the list of things wrong was never ending and continued to grow every day. His muscles were stiff and he ached in places he wasn’t sure one was supposed to ache; it was making him feel much older than his 35 years. But even with all of that, the exhaustion wouldn’t shut his mind off.

Eventually, six rolled around and Dwalin got up. The moment he saw Thorin sitting in the living room, second cup of coffee within arm’s reach, papers out in front of him on the coffee table, and pencil sketching out plans, he grumbled in annoyance and stomped into the kitchen.

Thorin only rolled his eyes at his cousin’s grumbling, keeping to his work until a plate of toast was shoved in front of him so he couldn’t draw anymore. “It’s something for the boys; no need to get that already ugly nose bent out of shape.” He muttered as he slipped a hair tie from around his wrist and tied back his hair so it wouldn’t get in the food. He picked up the toast with what looked like strawberry jam spread on it and took a bite.

Dwalin breathed out a laugh into his own mug of tea. “You’re not supposed to be workin’ on anythin’. It’s your day off. Did you even sleep?” He questioned.

Thorin shrugged a shoulder before pushing the plate aside and continuing on with his plans. He didn’t enjoy being fussed over; it made him uncomfortable. He drew another line along the handle of the sword he planned to create for Fili. His little knight had a birthday coming up in the next few months, and he knew a sword would be appreciated, and because the boys were so close and Kili’s birthday wasn’t long after, he would be getting one as well, though perhaps he’d have to rethink the sword idea for his dragon. “Believe it or not, I like to draw for fun too.”

Dwalin hummed as he sipped at his tea. “Here I was thinkin’ you’d forgotten how to even have fun.” Blue eyes glared over at him but the gruff man ignored him. “Your face has been a constant scowl.”

“You’re being dramatic.” Thorin accused but knew the words had some merit to them. He rarely smiled anymore, and when he did, it was because of the two children still sleeping in the other room. It had been rocky at first – rockier than it was now – but he had them to thank for keeping him from completely sinking into despair. That was wrong though; he was supposed to be the strong one and help them. He’d tried his best.

Thorin and Dis had been close since they were young. She had been his little sister, his partner in crime, and his best friend, and he’d named himself her guardian since the moment she’d been brought home. As they grew older it became quite apparent that she certainly needed someone looking after her.  His fondest memories of their childhood were the adventures she’d somehow roped him into, despite whatever trouble came as a result.

He’d watched her grow into a beautiful woman, and he’d even been the one to walk her down the aisle at her wedding because their father had died years before. He’d never thought that when she’d asked him to be the godfather to Fili, and then later Kili, that he would ever have to actually step into such a role for her.

Dwalin snorted, bringing him back from his thoughts. “I am not bein’ dramatic, but don’t take my word for it.” He glanced down at the plans before nodding his head and standing up. “I’m headin’ over to Balin’s. He’s got a few things he wants me to look at, and then I’ll be over on Main if you need me. But it’s your day off and you’re not doin’ any work, so you better not need me.” He side-eyed Thorin as he took his mug into the kitchen.

Thorin rolled his eyes and finished his toast while rolling up his drawings so he could hide them. His boys were rather curious and they liked to see anything he drew; it was best to hide them away now so there wasn’t a chance of them being found and peeked at. “I promise there will be no work today.” He was looking forward to just spending time with the two children without having work hanging over his head so much.

“Good.” Dwalin nodded and left soon after to run to his brother’s place.

Thorin was left to himself for a little less than an hour. His drawings had been stashed away in a closet in the room he was staying in, much too high a place even for adventurous little boys to get to, and he had just started on breakfast.

“Daddy.” The sleepy voice made him turn around and he spotted Kili peeking into the kitchen, pajamas bedraggled and hair a mess. What caught Thorin’s attention was the silent blond standing behind his brother, clinging to Kili’s hand with one of his own while the other was up at his mouth so he could suck on his thumb. Thorin knew what that meant before Kili confirmed it. “Fili says today is a sad day.” The youngest explained simply.

“He does?” Thorin asked as he turned the stove off for a moment, knowing that breakfast could wait. He moved to the two boys and knelt down, smoothing down Kili’s hair with one hand even as he pulled the boy closer so he could plant a kiss on his forehead. He reached out for Fili next, carefully drawing the child closer. “You’ve decided today’s a sad day, sweetheart?” He asked as he ran his fingers through Fili’s damp hair. The child must have had a nightmare before waking up; those were coming less frequently, but one was usually followed by a sad day. This was the first sad day in a while, and Thorin had to wonder if the change in location might have been the cause.

When Fili didn’t respond, Thorin drew him into a tight hug, kissing his forehead just as he’d done Kili’s and simply held him for a few extra moments. “Okay.” He nodded, knowing what the day would entail now. Sad days were always the same. He looked up at Kili who was waiting patiently, knowing his brother needed a little extra attention today. “Alright, Kili, I want you and Fili to gather up all the blankets and pillows from your room and mine and put them in the living room. Can you do that for me, honey?” He asked the child.

“Not Uncle Dwalin’s room?” The brunet tilted his head curiously, messy hair flying about.

Thorin shook his head, “No, we’ll leave Uncle Dwalin’s room alone.”

Kili grinned brightly and nodded. “Yeah! We can do that! Come, Fee!” He was normally a very impatient child and rarely stood still for long, but on sad days he gained the patience of a saint and proved it now as he waited for Fili to reach for his hand.

Once both of his boys were gone to get the blankets, Thorin moved three of the chairs from the dining room into the living room instead, setting two of them up in front of the television so there was about four feet in between. The third chair went behind and right across from the television so they made a triangle. The cushions on the couch were plucked from their places and settled in between the three chairs.

“Here, Daddy!” Kili announced when the two had returned, both lugging arms full of as many blankets and sheets as they could carry.

Kili had started calling him ‘Daddy’ first, and then Fili had eventually copied him when he’d started speaking again. Thorin had tried to dissuade them from doing so, correcting them every time and reminding them that he was their uncle. He hadn’t wanted to replace their real father in their hearts, and he definitely didn’t want them to forget the few precious memories they might have had.

He had realized it was a losing battle when, after a particularly bad day for all of them, an emotional Kili had screamed at him.

_“We know! We don’t care!”_

_Is that okay, Dis? Would it upset you to know they call me that?_ The thought crossed his mind at least once a day, but he’d never get an answer.

Kili’s face was flushed with exertion and he was beaming happily as he dropped the sheets he was carrying at Thorin’s feet. “I’ll get th’ pillows!” He promised, racing off back toward their room.

Fili stood silently next to the blankets until Thorin motioned for him to come closer. “Can you bring my sheet over here?” The boy did after a moment, moving slowly as he dragged the long sheet behind him until he could hand it to Thorin. “Thank you, Fili.” Thorin gently ruffled the blond hair before spreading the blanket over the cushions and tucking it around them to keep them all in place.

They always made sure to interact with Fili the same way they would any other day. Some days he’d respond more, some days he wouldn’t. Today seemed to be a day he responded more, which Thorin was thankful for.

Kili returned soon after, dropping the pillows he’d collected into the pile of blankets. After that the three of them worked together to build the pillow fort. Thorin threw the lighter sheets over the chairs to make a tent for them, and both Kili and Fili (mostly Kili) moved about inside and placed pillows where they thought they needed to go. The larger quilts were also dragged inside but they’d be used as actual blankets eventually.

Once the structure was done, Thorin knelt down and pulled the two sheets away like flaps of a tent so that the television would be seen from inside.

“Are we goin’ t’ watch a movie, Daddy?” Kili wondered as he peered out at the older man.

Thorin nodded. “How about we let Fili pick the first movie, then you can pick the second. I’ll make us some French toast to eat for breakfast and we can eat it in the pillow fort.”

Kili grinned excitedly and gently tugged on Fili’s arm. “Daddy’s gonna let us eat here!” He giggled happily. Normally they weren’t allowed to eat anywhere but in the kitchen, but sad days had different rules and Kili always tried to share his enthusiasm with his brother. He gently coaxed Fili from the fort and over toward a small box that contained their small collection of children’s movies. “Come on, you get to pick th’ first movie! You can jus’ point to it an’ I’ll get it.” He promised.

Kili was well acquainted with his brother’s sad days and knew just how to react, though he didn’t understand that they were because of lingering trauma, and that it was his brother’s way of coping with it. What he did understand was that Fili went silent for a day every once and a while, and the best remedy for making his brother feel better was to spend the day watching movies and snuggling. Sad days used to be a constant at the beginning when Fili had remained mute for almost eleven months after the fire, so they’d all had plenty of time to figure out what worked best and what didn’t.

Getting that call from the hospital and learning about the fate of his sister and brother-in-law had been devastating, and learning that both of his nephews had been admitted with smoke inhalation and several burns was the last thing Thorin had ever expected.

When he’d arrived at the hospital, it had been chaos. The nurses had tried to separate them, but every time they attempted it, Kili would have an all-out screaming fit. Fili had been unresponsive; the doctors had used the word catatonic to describe him. The devastation from the event was so obviously evident that it had broken Thorin’s heart the moment he’d laid eyes on them. The hospital staff had managed to treat their wounds as they clung to each other, finally able to separate them once Thorin had arrived.

Luckily, aside from smoke inhalation, most of Kili’s wounds had only been surface wounds and had been easily taken care of. The exception was along his left shoulder where something had seared his skin enough to leave a slight scar.  The toddler had been given medication to help with the pain while his injuries healed.

Kili had been too young to really understand what had happened, though he knew that their parents were missing and he and his brother were hurt. Once released into Thorin’s care, Thorin found that he’d become prone to fits of anger, wanting his mother or father near, and he barely slept at night unless Thorin rocked him. He’d been very confused and temperamental, and Thorin had done his best to explain everything, but it was a little too much for the toddler to comprehend.

Fili had remained in hospital and had been unresponsive for a long time while his body healed. Once out of the hospital, his body would go through the motions but his mind had remained mostly absent.

Worried that something more could be wrong, Thorin had taken him to several specialists. They’d done everything to make sure that there wasn’t anything wrong with him physically, and eventually Thorin had been informed by several doctors and two child psychologists that every child dealt with loss and grief differently and that his seemed to be Fili’s coping mechanism from the anxiety, stress, and fear caused by the trauma of what he’d gone through.

Fili had started to finally respond and eventually began speaking again. Thorin had come to see sad days as a lingering effect and accepted them as they happened.

“Fee wants this one, Daddy.” Kili crawled the short distance to bring Thorin the movie, handing it over before pulling his brother back inside their fort.

Thorin looked down at the DVD in his hand, unsurprised by what title he’d been given. It was the same movie Fili always picked to watch first, and Thorin wasn’t sure if _How to Train Your Dragon_ was for him or for Kili. Regardless, Thorin moved to the television and the player and begin to get the movie ready.

Kili suddenly gasped and Thorin turned back a little alarmed, unsure if something was wrong. His eyes scanned over both boys, but they looked fine, except for Kili’s sudden urgency to get out of the fort. “I’ll be back!” He promised before fleeing from the living room and down the hall. By the time he returned, the movie was on the main menu and waiting for him. In his arms he held Fang, his plush dragon. “I almost forgot her!” He giggled before practically diving back into the pillows and blankets. “Here, Fee, she takes my sadness away, so maybe she can help you!” He offered the toy to his brother, grinning brightly when Fili eventually accepted the dragon.

Thorin waited for them to get comfortable before starting the movie. “Will you two be okay while I make breakfast?” He wondered.

Getting comfortable meant lying together in a messy pile of limbs, as if they were trying to mould themselves into one being. Kili looked at his brother for a few seconds before turning back to Thorin, “We’ll be okay.” He promised before turning back to the movie as it began.

Satisfied, Thorin got up to make breakfast.

Upon returning he found that a spot in the middle of the fort had been cleared for him so both boys could be close. Fili made himself comfortable, taking up Thorin’s lap while they nibbled on their French toast and watched Toothless and Hiccup save the dragons of Berk. Normally the child would have made room for Kili, but not today. Kili didn’t notice as he sat right beside them, engrossed in the movie even though they’d both seen it a hundred times.

Once the dishes were put in the kitchen and all sticky fingers and faces were cleaned of syrup, another movie was put in but it didn’t hold the audience quite like the first one. Kili had dragged in a couple of colouring books, but also plain paper along with their ‘toolbox’ full of colouring utensils. They took their colouring and drawing very seriously because they knew Thorin ‘drew’ for a living, and the three of them coloured and drew for a good hour.

Kili grew a little restless just after they’d eaten lunch as he had plenty of pent up energy, but he refused to leave his brother’s side for very long. He got the chance to burn some of it off when a game of ‘dragon vs cave troll’ broke out, with Thorin being the cave troll who had apparently kidnapped the dragon’s beloved knight. Fili had started to respond more and had joined in the game.

The four-year-old dragon stomped around the blanket fort, growling and roaring his displeasure. He’d even gone so far as to change into one of his pajama tops that had a hood with horns sewn into the back to look like dragon horns. There were spikes going down the spine of the shirt that ended in a short dragon tail.

The opened flaps of the fort had been closed as the cave troll had hidden within it, taking his hostage with him.

“I want my knight!” Kili growled from outside.

Thorin and Fili watched his shadow crossed over the light coloured sheets so they knew where he was at all times. “He’s mine. You can’t have him.” Thorin responded ruffling the head of blond hair as Fili leaned against his shoulder. The boy’s face was a little flushed from their game after almost being rescued twice.

Kili’s shadow stood to their left with his hands on his hips, and in a way it looked a little like he had wings. “Cave trolls don’t need knights!” He insisted before kneeling down and beginning to crawl in hopes of finding a way into the cave.

Thorin shifted to the very back of the fort but was careful not to press up against the blanket to give away their position. He’d done that once and Kili had pounced on him, almost bringing all the blankets down around them. “Cave trolls have to eat too.” He insisted, hugging Fili to him and pretending to eat him.

The child squirmed in his arms and actually released a soft squeal. Even that small sound was a relief to hear after so much silence.

By the way Kili froze at the noise Thorin assumed he heard it to. “No! You can’t eat my knight!” The dragon roared, moving quickly around the fort to see if he could spot their location. “Don’t worry, Fee! I’ma save you! Uncle Dwalin can cook troll for supper!”

“Troll won’t taste very good.” Thorin promised as if he knew this for a fact.

“Uncle Dwalin can make anythin’ taste good!” Kili declared loudly.

Chuckling at that, Thorin leaned down until he could whisper into Fili’s ear. “Shall I let the dragon rescue his knight?” He wondered, but Fili shook his head and clung to Thorin’s shirt. “Okay.” Thorin nodded, rubbing the child’s back comfortingly. “Then what if we catch the dragon instead?”

Fili tilted his head and thought about it for a moment before finally nodding, showing more excitement than he had all day.

Thorin returned the smile, pressing a quick kiss to the boy’s forehead before thinking of a way to draw Kili close enough to grab. “Alright.” He called out to the dragon, “I’ll release your knight.” He promised and enjoyed the warmth in his chest as he listened to Kili cheer his victory. He almost felt bad for the trick he was about to play.

A pillow was grabbed and shoved against the tent flap. From the outside it should have looked like a body leaning against the sheet and would hopefully draw Kili close enough to grab. “Here’s your knight, oh great dragon.” Thorin called, watching as Kili’s shadow carefully crept closer to his trap. Fili crawled out of his lap so that Thorin would be able to grab his brother and sat close by to watch what happened.

“Fee.” Kili whispered, but Kili didn’t really know how to whisper quietly. “I’m gonna save you, okay?” He promised just as Thorin peeked out between the sheets. He spotted the dragon crawling slowly across the floor, the hood of his shirt covering his head in a way that Kili couldn’t see him looking out. The moment Kili reached for the pillow Thorin pounced, snatching the dragon up and pulling him inside the cave.

“No!” Kili shrieked loudly, squirming and struggling amidst his laughter as his sides and tummy were tickled. Thorin couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him as he held the little dragon while continuing his vicious attack for another few seconds. When he stopped, Kili lay limp over his knee, “You win, cave troll.” The child ‘whispered’ before letting his tongue hang from his open mouth.

“So, that means I can eat you then.” Thorin took a hold of one of Kili’s ankles and brought his bare foot up to his mouth. Before the boy could do anything, he pressed his lips against the arch of Kili’s foot and blew against it.

The reaction was instantaneous. Kili’s shriek was louder than before and he burst into hysterical giggles as he tried to kick his foot free. The cave troll let him, allowing him to scramble towards his brother. Thorin couldn’t help the laughter that escaped him. He hadn’t felt so warm and content in a long time, and the lighthearted fun he’d been roped into today was just what he’d needed.

When his own merriment had calmed, he looked to find his boys both staring at him with wide eyes. “What is it?” He asked, not understanding why they both suddenly looked so shocked.

He watched as they exchanged a look, a silent conversation only between the two of them, before they finally turned back to him. “You laughed.” Kili said, as if that was explanation enough. “You never laugh.”

Thorin looked at them a little confused before it actually hit him. He couldn’t really remember the last time he’d allowed himself to laugh like that. He cleared his suddenly tight throat, looking at them and shrugging his shoulders. He didn’t know how else to react to this startling revelation. “You boys make me happy, so I laughed; it’s not a big thing.”

“It is to us.” Kili’s eyes were suddenly glassy and his bottom lip quivered a little. Fili didn’t look that much better off with his own trembling chin and bright eyes.

Within the next moment, Thorin had both boys clambering back into his lap, pressing themselves against him as they hugged him tightly. He returned the affection, pressing multiple kisses to foreheads and suddenly tearstained cheeks as he clung to them. Thorin didn’t know what to say, words getting stuck around the lump that had formed in his throat, so he decided not to say anything at all and simply held them both while they held him.

They usually took a nap in the afternoon, so when both children had ended up crying themselves to sleep, Thorin wasn’t surprised. They’d probably needed that bit of release too. He carefully laid them out next to each other on one of the cushions beneath them before tucking the blankets in around them so that they’d be comfortable. The plush dragon was tucked between them in case either woke up to find it missing.

After sneaking out of the fort, Thorin escaped to the kitchen to make himself another cup of coffee. He felt a little shaken and unsteady, but at the same time he felt lighter and a little relieved, as if a weight had been lifted from him.

The rest of the afternoon was quiet. Once the boys woke up, the fort was deconstructed and all the sheets and pillows were returned to their proper places. Thorin returned the chairs to the dining room and hung the newly coloured pictures up on the fridge.

When Dwalin finally returned home that evening, they had all been planted on the couch still in their pajamas. Thorin was stretched out with his feet in front of him, ready to drop off to sleep at any moment. He hadn’t felt so relaxed in a long time, and the fact that he hadn’t been allowed to move for the last half an hour had helped. Both of his arms had been taken hostage, Fili on his left and Kili on his right, so that they could colour in between the lines of his tattoos.

Fili was a careful colourer and always made sure he stayed within the lines with careful strokes of his marker. He tended to favour the tattoo on Thorin’s left bicep, though as it was a shield and a sword that didn’t surprise anybody. The tattoo had been shaded for depth and realism, but both the shield and the sword had many detailed spots that could be coloured in. Fili’s and Kili’s names were both written along an area of the shield, representing Thorin’s will to always protect and defend them.

Kili looked up from the outline of a dragon that had been inked on to Thorin’s right arm when it became clear that the two boys couldn’t share the one tattoo without arguing over colours. The tail wrapped around the upper part of his arm while the body snaked down and around until the head rested above the inside of his wrist. It was one of the newest that had been added to Thorin’s small collection, and Kili had always enjoyed colouring it different colours. Today it was a regular green colour, though Kili was not as careful with his strokes as Fili, so it was a somewhat messy dragon.

“Hi Uncle Dwalin!” The boy grinned brightly as he waved his green marker at the man.

Dwalin studied the three of them for a few moments, Thorin assuming he was taking in their dishevelled appearances and surprised by the fact that nobody had dressed the entire day “Not your uncle, brat.”

“Don’t care.” Kili stuck his tongue out before going back to his colouring.

“Quiet day?” Dwalin stepped further into the room, glancing around to see if he could figure out what they’d been up to.

“Sad day. We watched a few movies, played a few games.” Thorin carefully shrugged his left arm when Fili let go to grab a different colour from his side. “We’re having dragon for supper tonight.”

Kili whined and looked up at him in horror. “No, we’re eatin’ cave troll!” He insisted.

Thorin only smiled and pulled the boy up so he could rub his stubble against the boy’s face. Kili squawked and tried to get away. “The cave troll caught the dragon, you little imp.”

“Dragon tastes better than cave troll anyway.” Dwalin played along as he sank into the chair Thorin had had his breakfast in. “And we’re out of cave troll.”

Kili huffed unhappily but gave in. “Fine. We’ll eat dragon.” He muttered and once he was let go he went back to his colouring. They’d continue until they were done because neither could leave either tattoo unfinished.

Supper was a quiet affair overall. Both boys were exhausted from their day and while Fili still remained silent, he engaged in other ways like sharing some of his dragon-chicken with Kili when Kili’s piece fell to the floor. While Dwalin hadn’t experienced a sad day since the very beginning, he knew what to expect from the eldest and went with the flow.

The day was finished off with a much needed bath, and Thorin managed to brush out their hair when they were finish. If he didn’t he knew it would be a nightmare the next morning from going an entire day without care. He’d thought about getting the two of them a haircut, but whenever he mentioned it they refused. They wanted long hair like him.

“I don’t want braids.” Kili wrinkled his nose as he watched Thorin weave Fili’s hair into a single long braid. Thorin had done it for Dis on many occasions when they’d been young, and the familiar movements were almost therapeutic.

“It’s only one, and it’s only to keep you from looking like a monster in the morning.” Thorin insisted, tying off Fili’s braid before dragging Kili onto his lap too.

The four-year-old squealed and giggled in an attempt to get away, but he was contained and a braid was quickly made while Kili was distracted with Fili’s hair. “I have a tail!” Kili realized and whipped his head around until he became dizzy and fell over, almost falling off the bed and dragging Fili with him.

Thorin caught the brunet and picked him up long enough to get the covers of the bed pulled back. “Yes, you do. Now be careful you don’t hit your brother with it.” Thorin smiled as he tucked the wriggling boy in. He picked Fili up next and he curled up next to Kili once he’d been tucked in.

“I won’t hit Fili.” Kili promised, wrapping his arms around Fili’s neck and planting a noisy kiss on his cheek.

Fili ducked his head a little but hugged Kili close.

“I know. You’re both good boys.” Thorin leaned over and kissed both their foreheads. He paused and gently poked Fili’s nose. “If you have a nightmare tonight, you come and get me, or send Kili to come get me, okay?” He spoke gently, wanting the boy know that he was there if and when Fili needed him.

It wasn’t the monsters or ghosts of other children’s nightmares that haunted Fili at night. It was the sound of his brother’s panicked screaming, the suffocating choke of smoke filling his lungs, and the heat of a burning house searing into his flesh. These weren’t things that anyone so young should know, and they weren’t things that Thorin could help him fight against easily, but the older man was willing to do whatever he could.

Fili moved then, sitting up and holding his arms out for a hug. Thorin drew him into one and held him tightly. It was more of a ‘thank you’ than the man could have ever asked for.

Once the boys were both tucked in again, the framed picture of their parents was handed over so they could say goodnight. Fili remained quiet as he traced first their mother’s face, then their father’s. He brought the picture close to give them each a kiss before passing it over to Kili, and just like every night, Kili did the same.

The picture was replaced on the night stand and the nightlight was turned on. Fang was found underneath a blanket.

“She wants to sleep with Fili.” Kili insisted, so Thorin tucked the dragon in on Fili’s other side. Happy with that, Kili snuggled down with his brother. “Goodnight, Daddy.” He mumbled around a yawn.

“Goodnight, boys.” Thorin sat with them until they’d fallen asleep as he usually did. Once their breathing deepened, he carefully got up and left the room.

He found Dwalin sitting in the living room, reading one of the books he’d been working through for a while. His small reading glasses sat at the tip of his nose, and Thorin was sure that if he leaned forward just a bit they’d fall off. “You’re welcome.” The man muttered gruffly the moment Thorin sank down onto the couch beside him.

The brunet looked at him oddly, “For what?” He managed around a yawn.

Dwalin huffed and lowered his book, peering at Thorin from over his glasses. Thorin shifted uncomfortably, aware that he was being studied. “You’re practically beaming. Looks like a day off did you some good.” He shifted smugly.

Ah, of course. “My _boys_ did me some good, so I suppose I should thank you for giving me the time to spend with them.” He didn’t even think to hide the smile that was forming on his face.

Dwalin noticed it right away. “Well. Would you look at that.” He stared a moment and shook his head.

“What now?” Thorin groaned, rubbing the end of his nose in annoyance. He was tired and not willing to put up with any antics. Maybe he’d even get some sleep when he finally retired to bed.

“You haven’t forgotten how to smile after all.”


End file.
